Don't Panic!
by Starzki
Summary: Collection of short Full Metal Panic drabbles. These will be mostly focused on the Sousuke/Kaname pairing, but will also feature Weber/Mao and any other pairings that tempt me into writing them.
1. Desire

Author's Note for _Don't Panic!_: Thanks to Luxken27's summer mini challenge, I have some prompt inspiration and I've decided to write up some drabbles for _Full Metal Panic_. These will all be generally short one shots (unless I change my mind) in a variety of different genres at different times in the series. I'll probably skip around a bit. These drabbles are just a collection of stories and they will focus mainly on the Sousuke/Kaname pairing, but be on the lookout for Weber/Mao and any other pairings (or maybe even genfic) that might come up.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of _Full Metal Panic_ or the characters written by Shoji Gatoh and I'm not receiving any money for writing these stories.

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><p>Title: Desire<br>Author: Starzki  
>Rating: K+<br>Genre: Introspection/Angst  
>Prompt: sky blue<br>Word Count: 439  
>Summary: Sousuke learns what it is to want.<p>

-x-

Sousuke learned at a young age how dangerous it was to want something. He didn't remember a time in his life where something he might have desired wasn't cruelly taken from him.

Sousuke knew how ephemeral everything in his life truly was. He could count on no one and nothing. Even something as simple as a clear blue sky, a meal at the end of the day, or a friendship could all be ripped away from him by the simplest things: a windstorm, a mangy cur that hadn't been fed in weeks, or a stray bullet.

It was best not to want. That way, Sousuke could be happily surprised when the day stayed pleasant, when he went to bed with a full belly, or when he amicably parted ways with a colleague whose company he had enjoyed.

For much of his life, Sousuke only ever really wanted one thing: to live. It was the only thing that couldn't end up hurting him if and when it was taken away. He wanted his life; anything positive that came with living it, even any good that he did with it, was merely a bonus to him.

But then Sousuke met Kaname Chidori. It was then he knew what true desire felt like.

He tried to fight it. He knew how much danger she was in and how desperately her enemies wanted to chew up her mind and spit out her empty shell when they were done. He'd seen it before.

Sousuke tried to fight it. Kaname, without even realizing it, fought him back. He saw how absolutely alive she was. She could look at the big blue sky and want and love and sing and rage and care and live. She was like a pretty blue flame that danced from place to place and never ceased to shine with life.

A part of Sousuke believed that Kaname was too alive to really be in danger and he slowly forgot about the perils of wanting. After all, she proved time and again that she could handle the obstacles that were thrown her way. Day by day, his desire grew and spread like a wildfire, especially when it seemed as though she might also want him back.

He couldn't help it. He wanted her. He wanted just to stand by her. He wanted her to look at him with that passion for life in her beautiful brown eyes. He wanted to share his life with her.

He wanted her, a future with her, and some days he thought that his focused desire for her might be the one thing that made him human.

END.

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><p>AN2: I'm so happy to be writing back in the FMP fandom again. Let me know what you think!<p> 


	2. The Trouble with Townies

Title: The Trouble with Townies  
>Author: Starzki<br>Rating: T  
>Genre: Romance, or something like it<br>Prompt: summer fling  
>Word Count: 1220<br>Summary: Summer flings become much more complicated when there's someone else who cares for you.

-x-

The bad feelings started when Melissa Mao was caught sneaking a townie out of their base camp.

A number of Mithril soldiers, including Melissa and Kurz, were asked to attend training courses in Australia over the summer. The base camp for this training was located near a small town that boasted a number of fully-stocked bars full of outgoing and friendly locals. The soldiers had enough down-time from training to take advantage of both.

Mao certainly had.

After only three weeks in Australia, the camp guards had caught her trying to sneak a young, handsome man through a gap in the perimeter's fencing. It was only because Melissa had taken precautions, leading the man on a circuitous route that never came near any rooms or locations that might hint at even what type of military encampment they were, that she was able to avoid formal censure. It also helped that they young man seemed about as intelligent as a box of rocks.

Though the news of her little midnight rendezvous spread through the camp like wildfire, Mao carried on like nothing had happened. She held her head high, ignored questions from her peers, and generally acted as though she had done nothing wrong.

It was her lack of embarrassment that ticked Kurz Weber off the most. He rationalized that his anger had something to do with indignation that a fellow soldier would dare attempt something so dangerous with a local even when he knew that he had covered for another friend who had snuck in a local girl the previous weekend.

But Mao had been caught. Therefore, everyone knew about her little summer fling. Weber knew about her little summer fling. And that felt unforgivable.

Never one for the high road, the next time he saw Melissa, he saw the opportunity for a little dig.

"Sergeant Weber, about the report that covers those tactical maneuvers we discussed last week?" Mao started.

Kurz cut her off, "Yeah, babe, maybe later. I heard the VD doctor is only on site for the next few hours and you might want to head over there and get checked out before she leaves."

The warmth that had been in Melissa's eyes at first seeing Kurz froze over. She frowned and sniffed. Kurz almost hoped she would deck him and have it over with, but she just ignored his insult. "I expect them at 1900 tonight." She then brushed past him and vanished into one of the nearby tents.

Kurz still felt angry.

-x-

In another two weeks, the camp had all but forgotten Mao's little dalliance. She had been nothing but professional since the incident and most of the soldiers at the camp even forgot that there was a gorgeous young woman underneath the tough, foul-mouthed persona she exuded.

Additionally, there had even been a small breakthrough as to the capabilities of the new batch of Arm Slaves. They discovered that when a certain procedure was followed, even the most novice of AS pilots could pull off an advanced defense maneuver that could potentially save hundreds of lives.

To celebrate, most of the camp went to town to get drunk. Mao had to take care of some paperwork before she caught up.

When she got to the bar, she looked around for Kurz, but couldn't find him. Instead, she saw a huge crowd gathering outside of the men's bathroom.

Paying it little mind, she ordered a beer and looked forward to finally having it out with Kurz when she saw him, to clear the air between them.

About half way through her beer, a soldier glowing with gossip came up to Mao. She cupped her hand around Mao's ear and whispered, "Sergeant Weber is banging some townie in the bathroom _right now_."

Melissa didn't answer. She only downed the rest of the beer and took off.

Kurz exited the bathroom and scanned the bar for Melissa just in time to see the back of her before the door to the bar closed behind her.

Then, for the next two hours with another six beers and the blonde chick's tongue in his ear, he tried not to notice he felt worse than when he came into the bar.

Melissa refused to talk to him for the rest of their time in Australia. _She_ hadn't meant to get caught. She was only scratching an itch and it had been only bad luck that her business suddenly had become common knowledge. But what Kurz did, putting on a performance for the whole camp, felt vindictive and mean.

What he had done had hurt her more than she cared to admit.

-x-

Both Mao and Weber were glad when the training camp ended, when they returned to active duty for Mithril, and when they were once again deployed into combat. The summer was ending and the cool promise of autumn was just around the corner.

They had joined up with the national military of some country that was primarily jungle. Their mission was to determine the local junta's firepower and report back their findings. The recon work was arduous and their squadron had been discovered.

With radios jammed and all other outlets to call in backup effectively blockaded, Mao and Weber both volunteered to traverse the two-day journey to the nearest forward operating base set up by the nationals. It seemed almost a suicide mission, but both Melissa and Kurz had enough faith in the other's abilities to know that they would see it through to the best possible outcome.

The ill-will of the previous weeks at the Australian training camp hadn't faded, but both were able to move beyond the hurt and focus on the task at hand. They were both alive. They were both confident in the other's abilities. They were physical machines that could both anticipate and dispatch any hostiles in the area. They worked in tandem with the ease that came with years of familiarity and experience.

After roughly thirty-six hours, both were too exhausted to go on without at least a couple hours of rest. They had come to a quiet, clear area towards the very edge of the jungle. Both agreed that it was the best time to catch a couple hours of light sleep before moving on to the FOB only eight hours away.

To ensure both were ready for any incoming attack, they sat back-to-back and slept as well as they could with their eyes open to catch any sudden movement.

Some time in those few hours they slept, either Melissa or Kurz or both grasped hands. Both awoke and became aware of the strangely intimate contact at the same time.

They didn't drop the other's hand. They just looked from their intertwined fingers, up the other's arm, and into the other's eyes. At that moment, any enmity that existed between the two vanished.

"No more townies?" asked Weber.

"No more townies," confirmed Mao.

Both Melissa and Kurz took the time to smile reassuringly at the other before dropping their hands and moving on to the next landmark.

They knew it would be okay. They had each other. They trusted each other. And now, with the threat of anonymous summer flings gone, that warm, loving thing neither one of them wanted to admit existed between them found the opportunity to grow.

END.

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><p>Author's Note: This is my first WeberMao. Obviously, I'm still trying to get the feel for them and their relationship. This story was longer than the drabbles I promised, but I think I needed the extra words to fully flesh out this story and my first attempt at their romance. Let me know what you thought of this!


	3. Obvious

Title: Obvious  
>Author: Starzki<br>Rating: K+  
>Genre: Introspection<br>Prompt: breezily  
>Word Count: 496<br>Summary: Why can't Sousuke see what's so painfully obvious to everyone else?

-x-

Look, I know I'm probably not fooling anyone when I try to push down my anger and pretend that something ridiculous that Sousuke does is just a-okay with me.

Well, I'm probably fooling Sousuke, but that's not so hard since he takes everything so seriously. I mean, it's not like I can't tell that he's hiding his feelings, too. He just puts on his expressionless military face, stands at attention, and everything is suddenly "not a problem" despite the fact I can see the sweat running down his face.

Hmmph.

Anyway, I know that most of my friends and classmates can see that even when I try not to show that Sousuke's antics are making my blood boil with rage (usually with very good reason), I'm really not doing a very good job of putting on a calm face.

But _you_ try to keep _your_ calm when some military fanatic blows up _your_ locker, sets off the sprinkler system at _your_ school at least once a week, or suddenly has a strange girl peeking out from his bathroom in nothing but a towel asking him for a spare t-shirt. Go ahead and try!

Any one of those things is enough to cause feelings of rage, dismay, and betrayal in your average teenage girl. _Which I am_!

You know, it actually wouldn't be so hard to put up with if I could just kind of hate him. Like if he was just some guy hired to protect me that I couldn't care less about. But Sousuke has to go and be all courageous and heroic and stuff. And I won't say that he looks terrible in his AS outfit, either. Then there are the times when he's actually insightful and makes me feel like he actually knows me and cares about me that I start to feel bad about the times that (justifiably) blow up at him.

This is all so hard. Really, it's tough enough to just be a normal girl. I've really tried hard my whole life to fit in and teenagers have to walk that fine line so that the things we do or say are the "right" things so that other people will like us. So sometimes I can't come out and say what I mean because I'll get called "bossy" or "too forward" or maybe even "shameless," but I there are times that I do try to let him know how I feel. But he listens only to my words, where I'm too cautious and unsure, and not any of the other ways I'm communicating with him. It's so frustrating!

So when he goes too far to protect me from imagined terrors, when he embarrasses me in front of my friends, and just when he doesn't get me, I'll do my best to say, "I don't care," breezily. I'll even try to mean it.

But it kind of hurts when he still believes me when what I say is so obviously untrue.

END.

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><p>Author's Note: This is my attempt at trying to capture Kaname's voice. She might be a tad too insightful about her feelings and actions here, but I don't think it's too far off. As always, I appreciate all feedback!<p> 


	4. There It Is

Author's Note: I admit it. This isn't even close to a drabble in length. But this story just wouldn't let me go. Hopefully I've gotten it out of my system.

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><p>Title: There It Is<br>Author: Starzki  
>Rating: T (for language)<br>Genre: Drama, Humor  
>Prompt: smile<br>Word Count: 2075  
>Summary: Sometimes it takes a stranger to point out the obvious. SK.

-x-

Kaname disembarked the plane in Austin feeling halfway between angry and upset. It had been a long, tiring ten days with way too much travel and danger.

In an effort to prevent the most recent kidnapping attempt by Amalgam, Kaname had been shuffled from one safe house to another, always just mere steps ahead of her pursuers. She had even split up from Sousuke, Melissa, and Kurz in an effort to distract her would-be attackers from knowing their next moves. She had been in five different countries in the last seven days and was jetlagged and exhausted. She also felt a little guilty for being in the United States and not taking the opportunity to visit her father and sister. But that was too dangerous.

Today was the day she was scheduled to rejoin her trio of bodyguards in Texas. Kaname didn't know many of the details. She only knew what Sousuke told her in their brief phone conversations that usually gave her only a few minutes advanced warning of where she would be traveling to and who she would be meeting next.

Just seconds after turning back on her phone, it rang.

"Yes?" she answered, hoping it was Sousuke.

It was. "Chidori, have you landed in Austin? Are you okay?"

"Yes, yes," Kaname answered looking through the tall windows into the cloudless July sky. "I'm here. Are you picking me up?"

"Negative," Sousuke answered. She could hear a commotion in the background. It sounded like Melissa and Kurz were fighting. For a moment, Kaname tensed, afraid that their newest safe house would be just as dangerous as the previous ones. But she then heard music, Melissa laughing, and then a splash.

"What is going on, Sousuke?"

"Celina has a pool and the Sergeant Major and Kurz are... taking advantage." Sousuke sounded mildly annoyed.

"Celina?" asked Kaname.

"Yes. Celina Jekka. She'll be the one meeting you at the airport. She'll be at the baggage claim." There was more commotion in the background, delighted yelling and playful fighting. Kaname heard Sousuke address his colleagues away from his phone's mouthpiece, "Quit roughhousing. Kurz, put the Sergeant Major down." There was another splash, followed by a loud bellow. "I should go. Meet Celina. She's... safe. She has red hair."

And then Sousuke was gone.

Kaname frowned at her phone. She had hoped that at least Sousuke would sound a little happy to hear that she was so close. Instead, he just sounded hassled.

Kaname shouldered her bag and followed the signs down the stairs to baggage claim.

Celina wasn't hard to spot. Her long, wavy hair was so red that it looked like it might actually glow in the dark. She was wearing a white sleeveless cotton dress big enough to cover her very noticeable pregnancy. She guessed that Celina was six or seven months along.

As Kaname made her way toward her, she caught Celina's eye and gave a wave. Celina lit up in a bright smile and waved her over. She seemed nice. And with her red hair, blue eyes, and pale white skin, she looked like she would be at home in the Scottish Highlands.

But that illusion was quickly shattered as soon as Celina opened her mouth. "Kaname Chidori, right? Jesus H. Christ, you sure are pretty." Her voice was a husky Texas drawl and she could see how Celina and Melissa were friends.

"Is that all your stuff?" asked Celina. Kaname nodded. "We'll you don't need that jacket on, it's hot as a motherfucker outside."

Kaname gaped and followed Celina out of the doors of the airport, unprepared to hear that kind of language from a pregnant lady.

Two steps out of the air conditioned building and Kaname suddenly knew just how hot a motherfucker was. Tokyo got hot in the summer, but the ocean breeze kept it from getting stifling. Here in Texas, she felt as if the sun was broiling her from above while the ground baked her from below. It was truly oppressive and took Kaname's breath away. She quickly shrugged off her jacket and wished she hadn't worn jeans. Thankfully, it seemed as though Celina had parked in the parking garage just across the street and that they wouldn't be walking outside for long.

"Can I ask you something," ventured Kaname.

"Shoot."

"Why didn't anyone else come to pick me up?"

Celina pointed out her vehicle. "No room." She drove a dark blue, beaten up pickup truck with a covered bed. "It'll seat two, but that's it. Sousuke wanted to come, but I just don't think he have survived the trip back in the back of the truck. So it's just me." Celina gave Kaname another smile and helped her put her bag in the truck.

They got in and Celina turned on the car and cranked up the air conditioning as high as it could go. Celina cursed the stick shift as she navigated her way through the parking lot and onto the street that would lead them to the northbound toll road.

"Sousuke said you're a friend of Melissa's?" asked Kaname when they finally hit a stretch of clear road. Celina was pressing buttons, looking for songs on the radio stations. Once again surprising Kaname, Celina preferred metal and alternative rock to country. She tapped her finger on the steering wheel along with the beat.

Celina smiled again, with an impish sparkle in her eye. "Yup. We went through basic together. It was fucking hell, but we made fast friends with each other."

"You're in the Marines?" asked Kaname, somewhat surprised.

"Hell no. I washed out pretty soon after basic. I figured I couldn't ever kill anyone. Shit, I'm a goddamn vegetarian."

"So they just let you go?"

"Kind of. It took a while. I don't even know what I was doing there to begin with. I didn't know anyone in the military. I realized about the second day I was in the wrong damned place. But Mel knew what she was doing, so I pretty much attached myself to her hip and tried to do everything that she did. She was so fucking awesome, but I just didn't have it in me. So I got out."

"But you two stayed friends?"

"Yeah. We'd call one another up every once in a while and go out and paint the town red. Then she fell of the face of the map. It shocked the hell out of me when she called last week. I still have the same phone number I did back then."

"Hmm. You're not her family and not a friend from the military. I guess that would make it harder to trace her to you," Kaname said.

"Yeah. I don't know much about what's going on, but if Mel thinks it's safe, I trust her. I guess y'all will be leaving in a day or two. As far as I'm concerned, I'm having an old friend in for a visit and she brought more friends."

"How is everyone doing?" asked Kaname.

"Mel's great," she said over the music. "They got here two days ago and she and Kurz have been treating my house like a summer camp. We've been playing music all day, swimming, barbecuing, and doing everything but telling fucking ghost stories over the fire. It seems like y'all have been a little stressed out and it's nice to see a little decompression. And it's helping to take some of the stress off our little coming arrival for me and my husband." Celina patted her stomach.

"And Sousuke? How's he?"

Celina opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She tried again. "I don't know. I don't know him very well at all. He's not much of a talker, is he?"

Kaname nodded.

"He's... okay. He's very stern and he hasn't relaxed at all. Are you familiar with the term 'at loose ends?'"

"Yeah."

"Well, that's it. He seems very anxious. Worried. It's like he wants to do something, but there's really nothing to do. Except, he has taken to arming my fucking house."

Kaname huffed. "That doesn't surprise me at all."

The two fell into silence and Celina started pressing the radio buttons again. Suddenly, she gasped happily, delighted with the song that was playing. Kaname hadn't ever heard it before. It was a strange mix of alternative and rap, almost done in monotone. It had the filthiest and funniest lyrics describing sex that Kaname had ever heard.

Celina knew every word. She laughed and sang along with delight. Any note that she actually hit correctly seemed to be pure luck. Halfway through the song, she started adding silly dance moves that involved moving her hips and shoulders to the beat. Celina would take her eyes off the road just long enough to make funny faces at Kaname as she sang.

When the song was winding down, Celina said, "There it is!"

Kaname looked out her window. "Where what is?"

"Your smile. You seemed so down when I saw you that I've been trying to find a way to cheer you up. Turns out the only thing I had to do was embarrass myself with my signing and dancing."

Kaname chuckled.

"I've been trying to get the three at the house to smile, too. Mel was easy. Kurz was hard to get a genuine smile from, but I did in the end. I've fucking given up on Sousuke. I haven't gotten a one from him, no matter what I do or say."

"Yeah," agreed Kaname. "He's pretty serious."

"Hmm," agreed Celina. She changed the radio dial to a station that played popular dance music and the two bopped along to the music until they pulled into Celina's driveway ten minutes later.

Sousuke was outside and at the truck even before Kaname got her door open all the way. He looked her over, and helped her bring her things into the house, watching the roads warily for any signs of threat.

The house was small and cozy. Kurz was in the kitchen, mixing together sauces for the night's meal. His hair was still wet and he was sporting a purple bruise under his eye.

"Jesus. What happened to you?" asked Celina leaning over his saucepan to smell what he was cooking.

"Oh, you should see the other guy," he said with a wink.

"Hey Cel! The other 'guy' is just fine," answered Melissa, entering the kitchen and stealing a taste of Kurz's sauce. "How's our Angel? Were the flights okay? Sorry we had to give you such a weird route."

"I'm fine," said Kaname, finally starting to relax in her surroundings.

Sousuke turned around from looking out behind the blinds. "I don't see anyone following. You did well, Kaname. This type of traveling is difficult for anyone." He seemed relieved and pleased that they were no longer separated.

Celina, closing the fridge after getting bottled water, watched Sousuke and Kaname and a smile spread slowly across her lips. "Fuck me, there it is."

"What?" asked Melissa.

"Sousuke, that's the closest thing I've seen to a smile on your face since I've met you."

Sousuke regarded Celina, but didn't say anything.

"Well, duh! It makes sense. I didn't know you two were, you know, a thing." Celina chuckled and started to drink her water.

"What is she talking about?" Sousuke asked Kaname.

Melissa cupped her hand around Celina's ear and whispered. Celina choked on her water, spitting some of it on the floor before she started laughing and gasping at the same time.

"Shut up!" she told Melissa. "How can they _not_ be? Compared to what I've seen of him these couple of days, he's practically dancing a fucking jig, he's so happy to see her."

Melissa laughed and guided Celina out of the kitchen so she could explain it away from the others. They could hear Melissa's low tones.

"Fuck off," was Celina's incredulous shout. "They don't _know_? Are they fucking _blind_?" This was followed by laughter from both Celina and Melissa.

Kaname was slightly puzzled by the outburst from Celina. "I don't know what that's about, either," she finally answered Sousuke. She looked him over. Kaname didn't see any shocking transformation in Sousuke's normal demeanor.

To her, he looked the same as he always did when they were together.

Kurz just shook his head and returned to seasoning his sauce. He sometimes wondered how two pretty smart kids could be so dense at times.

END.

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><p>AN2: Again, I love to hear what readers think. For anyone who is interested or curious, I have been writing up notes, my thoughts and feelings about writing these stories, on my livejournal account. My user name there is starzki. There's a link on my profile page. Thanks for reading!<p> 


	5. Too Fresh

Title: Too Fresh  
>Author: Starzki<br>Rating: T  
>Genre: Humor, Romance<br>Prompt: seafood  
>Word Count: 704<br>Summary: Kurz and Melissa's first date goes about as well as you would expect.

-x-

I met the enemy and she was mine.

I successfully asked Melissa Mao out on a date.

It was tricky. It involved alcohol, but not too much. I had shared a particularly funny story about Sousuke and while Mao was laughing, I asked her to go out with me.

"Sure! Wait, what?" she said between giggles, looking surprised and confused at her answer.

I beat a hasty exit before she could change her mind.

The next day she cornered me, looking guilty and apprehensive. "Look, Weber, this isn't a good idea..." she started.

"Guess who landed reservations at Tokyo's newest, trendiest seafood restaurant?" was my reply. I didn't go into the details of how, but let's just say that I owed some pretty big favors to more than one person.

Melissa's face showed that her resolve to break the date was faltering. As stubborn as she is, the girl does love some nicely prepared crab. We would officially be going out that weekend while the TDD was docked in Tokyo.

Saturday night, she met me outside the restaurant looking drop-dead gorgeous. Melissa was wearing the dress she often used when she was to be the sexy bait on our missions. It was the slinky, long, black number that was backless but for the laces crisscrossing the flawless skin of her back.

She smiled, reached out a hand, and closed my mouth for me. Then, with a deadly growl in her voice, she warned me, "This dress is not an invitation. If your hands start wandering, I will put you down like the dog you are."

I find women who can scare the shit out of me extremely enticing.

I promised to be nothing other than a gentleman and Melissa graced me with a small, but genuine smile, taking note that I had also dressed well for the occasion. Let me tell you, I can rock a suit.

Dinner started out pretty well. We ordered without much conflict. Melissa, of course, ordered the crab special. I asked the waiter what was good. He answered me in simplified Japanese, which I'm used based on my looks, that he liked the mackerel. I was really only told it was "very, very fresh." I like fresh seafood as much as the next person, so I said I'd take it.

Conversation became stilted as we waited for the entrees. We were comfortable enough with one another, but the swanky surroundings and the fact that it was so very much a date was enough to make us second guess what we were going to say. War stories seemed out of place, and anything to lovey-dovey just didn't suit us. I searched my mind for more funny Sousuke stories.

Luckily, the dinner arrived soon after and we could concentrate on eating rather than making conversation.

Melissa looked hungrily at her own dish, then at my fish that was served whole, with the head still attached.

Suddenly, my fish twitched. It tried to breathe. They were not lying about it being fresh.

However, the movement startled Melissa. "Jesus FUCK," she yelled before producing a large hunting knife (from where, I have no idea) and reflexively stabbing the fish through the eye. She struck with such force that she shattered the plate below and impaled the knife into the table.

People stared at us. I went from utter shock at her deadly quickness to suppressing the need to double over with laughter.

Melissa colored rather prettily with embarrassment and used her chopsticks to un-skewer the fish from her knife before secreting it once more under the table. She then dug into the meal in front of her.

Hearing the commotion, our waiter was at our table just moments later. "Is there something the matter here?" he asked.

"Yes," I said. "I seem to have a broken plate. Could you please bring out one that is not broken so that I can enjoy my meal?"

He was confused enough at my audacity to quickly acquiesce and hurry away.

Melissa's eyes twinkled at me over her crab and she was doing a very poor job at holding back her smile. I had just scored major points in her book.

My night was certainly looking up.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Another first: Attempting Kurz Weber's voice. Let me know what you thought! Again, for those who are curious or interested, I write my notes about how I feel writing each story on my livejournal account under the user name starzki. You can find a link on my profile page.<p> 


	6. A Pro Among Pros

Title: A Pro Among Pros  
>Author: Starzki<br>Genre: Drama  
>Rating: K+<br>Word Count: 300  
>Prompt: Foolish<br>Summary: Spoilers for anime episodes 4 and 5. Kaname has been taken and Sousuke realigns his priorities.

-x-

Sousuke stood rooted to the spot. He knew what he was supposed to do and was amazed that he wasn't doing it.

His orders were clear. The lives of the hostages on the plane held priority over Chidori's kidnapping. She could be saved at a later date; two hundred fifty lives lost if the bomb exploded could not.

Obviously, Sousuke couldn't foolishly abandon them to save Chidori, but he remained torn. He had been sent to protect her, to prevent this kidnapping.

These weeks he'd gotten to know her, Sousuke had begun to truly admire her spirit, even when she used it as a weapon against him.

The kidnappers did terrible things to the Whispered. He had seen the Whispered girl with the red hair, her dead eyes staring in horror. When he and his colleagues had finally been able to rescue her, they had to keep her sedated to prevent her from ripping out her fingernails with her teeth.

The same thing could happen to Chidori. Mithril could find her too late and she, too, would have that same haunted look and damaged psyche.

Gunshots sounded in the night air and turned Sousuke's thoughts even darker.

Gauron was here. He knew what Gauron would do. Sousuke anguished at the thought of Chidori having to face him alone.

Sousuke's feet began to move. They took him away from the hostages on the plane and toward the kind, willful, lovely, and ferocious girl. She didn't deserve this. Sousuke couldn't take the risk that the Kaname Chidori that they rescued at some point in the future wasn't the one he'd grown to know and respect.

He trusted his colleagues at Mithril to save the hostages without him. He had a job that he was sent to do.

He had to protect Chidori.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This drabble was written for the livejournal community fanfic_bakeoff for the "Foolish" prompt and posted there on August 19, 2011. As always, I do adore feedback on my writing.<p>

AN2: Scribefigaro has made an amazing Full Metal Panic! AMV. You'll find a link for it on my profile page. Check it out and let him know what you thought!


	7. Outburst

**Title:** Outburst  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 300  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Melissa/Kurz  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A kind of prequel to "There it Is." Celina has noticed that Kurz is just Melissa's type.

-x-

The first night waiting for Kaname at Celina's house was relaxing for the trio of bodyguards.

Celina managed to pull Melissa away from the highly technical discussion of arms slaves that Celina's husband had broached with Kurz and Sousuke.

"I can't believe you're married, Cel," said Melissa as Celina balanced the wedding photo album on her pregnant belly.

"I know. It's hard to tell from these pictures. The photographer seemed enthralled enough by the fucking fruit plate, but not the ceremony. But I did the deed."

An impish expression then crossed Celina's features. "And what about you, Mel? From what I've been able to observe, that tall, blond, drink of water over yonder is just your type."

"Weber? We work together. So no."

"Not even once? Just to try him out?"

"No."

"Come on," egged Celina. "I'm a married, fat, pregnant lady and I need my vicarious meaningless sex from _somewhere_."

"It _wouldn't_ be _meaningless_," snapped Melissa, immediately closing her mouth to prevent any more truth from escaping.

Celina's pressed the shocked circle of her mouth into a line, but her wide blue eyes betrayed the surprise and delight of Melissa's confession.

The men had gone silent at Melissa's outburst, so Celina covered by flipping the album's page, announcing, "And this fuchsia monstrosity would have been your dress had you answered the damned phone when I called to ask you to be a bridesmaid."

As the men went back to talking, Celina snickered. She motioned with her head towards Kurz, "I think you're in fucking trouble with that one."

"I know it." Melissa then looked down at the album and said with a smirk, "I can't believe you had the balls to wear white at the wedding."

The women's laughter was loud enough to once again interrupt the AS conversation.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note 1: This fic was originally posted on the livejournal community fandom_bakeoff on September 28, 2011 for the "observe" prompt and includes the secret ingredient, "fruit."<p>

AN2: Enough people liked Celina the last time that she found her way into a new story. As always, let me know what you thought of this!


	8. Distracting

Title: Distracting  
>Author: Starzki<br>Fandom: Full Metal Panic!  
>Word Count: 300<br>Genre: Friendship  
>Summary: Kyouko is adept at observing the world around her. What she's realized has her concerned for her friends and she will do what she can to help.<p>

-x-

Kyouko could always tell when Sousuke's chair was empty in the morning, even without looking.

She would hear constant sighs and fidgeting from Kaname as she flipped her hair and tried to appear nonchalant about the absent boy.

What was worst for Kyouko was the way Kaname's foot would tap as the seconds to the first bell ticked down. She could feel the vibrations from Kaname's nervously jiggling legs in her own chair, distracting her from her schoolwork.

Though perturbed at this not-uncommon beginning to her mornings, one look at her best friend would melt her heart. In her effort to not look upset or angry at Sousuke's absence, Kaname just looked miserable and worried.

She wished she could do something to comfort Kaname, but any effort to remark about the unmanned desk in the back of the room would only result in forced laughter and an immediate denial than anything could possibly be wrong. Both Kaname and Kyouko often felt worse after Kaname's desperate lies.

Kyouko wished they could just drop this stupid masquerade with Kaname playing the aloof classmate and Kyouko playing the cheerfully ignorant friend. She wasn't dumb. She knew that Kaname liked Sousuke. She had even begun to figure out that he was probably actually military, not just an otaku playing at being a soldier. He was protecting Kaname for some unknown reason. And Kyouko figured that when he was absent, he was probably out there doing something dangerous, which is what made Kaname so upset.

But the tenuous playacting was their familiar routine, so Kyouko did what she always did. She changed the subject. She would start taking funny pictures of other students to show Kaname in the hope she'd see her smile and forget that Sousuke, her protector and friend, was absent yet again.

END.


	9. Love is a Battlefield

**Title:** Love is a Battlefield  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!  
><strong>CharactersPairings:** Kurz/Melissa  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 299  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Kurz lets us know exactly what exactly drew him to Melissa. (Companion piece to "Rough" to be posted 1/25/12.)  
><strong>Warnings<strong>: Mention of sex, but nothing graphic.

-x-

A lot soldiers will tell you that they're fighting for some pretty little delicate thing taking care of their home front. They're fighting to protect what they love. They're fighting to protect those who can't protect themselves. And that's totally cool.

But that was never what I wanted. Well, I did want to protect people. What I couldn't understand was the concept of truly loving someone who couldn't take care of herself on a battlefield.

Don't get me wrong, I would indulge in the screaming hordes of gorgeous babes that were after my smokin' bod, but I never considered that might end up with one of those beautiful ladies one day. It just wasn't in the cards for me, or for them, and I knew it.

Then there was Melissa. The first day that she knocked me on my ass, I knew that I was a goner. Now here was a _woman_. She wouldn't let me get away with shit and I loved her for it.

I played the long game with her. I was my wonderful, charismatic self. But mostly I followed orders and I was one hell of a sniper. She eats that shit up, I swear to God. I found a way in under her skin. One day I noticed her gaze lingering on me.

Between you, me, and the wall, let me tell you, she's every bit as fierce and deadly in the bedroom as on the battlefield.

Now all I have to do is find my way back to her. I have to pull together all of my resolve to put the pieces of me back in place. What keeps me going is that I know she'll beat the shit out of me the moment she sees me again.

And I just can't wait.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This story was first published on the livejournal community fanfic_bakeoff on January 22 for the prompt "Delicate" with the bonus prompt "Resolution."<p> 


	10. Rough

**Title:** Rough  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!  
><strong>CharactersPairings:** Sousuke/Kaname  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki**  
><strong>Words:<strong> **300**  
><strong>Rating:<strong> **T**  
><strong>Summary:<strong> **Kaname could always keep up with him. Sousuke reflects on his faith in Kaname's strength. (Companion piece to "Love is a Battlefield" posted in Chapter 9.)**  
><strong>Warnings:<strong>**Sexual innuendo.

-x-

I've never been gentle with her. The first time I touched her, I threw her to the ground to protect her from what I believed was a terrorist. In the next second, she was on her feet, berating me for scraping her arm. I was wrong about the attacker then, but there were many other times that I was right and was just as rough with her.

The thing with Kaname, though, is she can take it. From the first time I laid eyes on her, I knew she was tough. She was beautiful, yes, but her body was ideally structured for survival. Physically, I knew she wouldn't shatter.

Even without my training, she could keep up with me. Step for step, she was always at my side, never slowing me down. Her presence encouraged me, spurred me faster, made me stronger. She could give me resolve with the fierce way she would meet my eyes.

The first time we were separated, I should have known that Gauron would lie about her, her death. I should have realized that Kaname was too resilient to let someone like him break her. Even as I wallowed in my grief and guilt, she found me and proved Gauron wrong. I promised I would never doubt her strength again.

The second time, I knew she could withstand their tortures, but I needed to get to her in order to end them. I wanted her back with me.

And now she's here. She's never been fragile and we've discovered that she hates if I treat too gently. Now, hot and wanton under me, she wants me to go harder, asks me for even more. My last thought, before I surrender to bliss, is gratitude that I'll never have to hold back my desire for her.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This drabble was first published on the livejournal community "fanfic_bakeoff" on January 22, 2012 for the "delicate" prompt and includes the extra ingredient, "resolution."<p> 


	11. A Dance with Death

**Title:** A Dance with Death  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!/Sandman  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki**  
><strong>Words:<strong> **300**  
><strong>Rating:<strong> **K+**  
><strong>Summary:<strong> **Sousuke, like everyone who meets her, falls in love with Death. Crossover between Full Metal Panic and Sandman series.**  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> None.**

-x-

Sousuke first encountered Death on the airplane that was soon to sink, with his mother, into the frozen sea.

He was immediately smitten with her, wanting her favor, her smile, for her to take him away. So he danced for Death as well as his toddler legs would let him. Delighted, Death laughed and clapped a beat for him, but when the time came, she only smiled sweetly and left him alone.

During the next few years, Sousuke met with Death again. Once was during a fever, and once when he lost a fight to a man with a knife. Each time, they would dance. Afterward, though, the dance proved only a tease, and Death would leave him alone again.

It was for her that Sousuke volunteered for the harshest missions. It was because he knew she was waiting that he rarely felt remorse for those he sent to her. It was forbidden, this enchantment with her. But she was kind. She was loving. She was beautiful.

Much later, as an adult with a belly full of bullets, Sousuke met Death once more. He strode up to her and pulled her into his arms and improvised a gallant dance he would never be capable of in the real world. He kissed her with all the devotion in his heart. She lifted a hand, finally, to take him with her.

"I can't," he replied. "Not this time."

Death nodded knowingly. "For her," she replied. Sousuke smiled his best smile, then twirled her. She laughed for him again. "Okay. Just because you're such a good dancer," she winked. "I wish you luck."

Sousuke, with regretful sadness, watched her twirl off into the darkness, hoping he would see her only once more as he didn't have it in him to refuse her again.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This story was first written for the "Tease" theme at the livejournal community fanfic_bakeoff on February 18, 2012. It contains the secret ingredient "Taboo."<p>

AN2: Again, I'd love to hear what you thought of this. Any further discussion of this fic from me can be found at my Livejournal account under "starzki."


	12. Selective Focus

**Title:** Selective Focus  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 300  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Shinji, Kyouko  
><strong>Rating:<strong> K  
><strong>Summary: <strong>Skill made a picture interesting. Luck made it unforgettable.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> None.

-x-

Shinji knew that while skill with a camera is necessary to get a good shot, a great picture often depended upon luck.

Shinji once used his experience and knowledge of framing, light exposure, orientation, and timing to line up the perfect shot of the new AS on his father's base. It would have been a good photo. However, the pilot turned the mecha's head at just the moment Shinji took the picture. The result was a breathtaking photograph of an AS whose eyes seemed to flash vengeance in a bright starburst of sunlight.

Skill made a picture interesting. Luck made it unforgettable.

It was the need to enhance his skill capturing living people in photos that brought Shinji to the grand opening of the new shopping center. He hoped to find something that would be half as exciting to shoot as his usual AS subjects.

After taking a few dozen pictures of smiling families, Shinji caught the sight of the bouncing green ribbons that tied Kyouko's hair into braids. Thrilled to see his classmate, he took a shot of her before she disappeared into a store.

As he developed the pictures, Shinji had high hopes for the picture of Kyouko. His spontaneity may have captured something truly special.

The picture emerged and Shinji's heart flip-flopped. The photo was beautiful. Kyouko was even more radiant than Shinji had remembered. She wore the smiling look of a girl who was completely happy in her life. He had been able to catch a flash of utter affection in her animated brown eyes, feelings that Shinji had suspected, but had not fully believed. Now, he had proof.

It was Shinji's bad luck that he had caught her when her eyes were turned to Ono-D and not toward the young man behind the camera lens.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This story was originally published on March 31, 2012 on the livejournal community fanfic_bakeoff for the prompt "Luck" and includes the bonus ingredient "green."<p>

AN2: Shinji just begged to be written for this prompt. I finally caved.


	13. The Downside of Self Control

**Title:** The Downside of Self-Control  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> _Full Metal Panic!_  
><strong>CharactersPairings:** Kaname/Sousuke  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 300  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Sousuke has a very human, very teenaged-boy reaction to Kaname eating a cherry.

-x-

Sousuke had guessed that the worst part of his day was going to be his Classical Japanese study session with Kaname.

He was right, but not for the reasons he thought.

Kaname had brought cherries to nibble while they studied and her cherry-eating ritual drove Sousuke to distraction.

Kaname's mouth was a feature of endless fascination for him. Its corners had a natural upward turn, making her seem on the verge of giving those around her a friendly smile or ready laugh. Even when he was around Kaname enough that her beauty seemed almost ordinary, a single quirk of her mouth could draw him in.

But he was in control. He couldn't afford, for her sake, not to be. Distractions were bad; they got you killed.

Yet the way she ate her cherries was tearing his self-control to shreds. She would nibble off the bottom and absentmindedly suck out the pit. After setting the seed aside, she would press the mangled top to her lips, staining them dark red with its juices as she patiently corrected Sousuke's work.

Sousuke caught himself licking his own lips as she played with the last cherry. His pants were getting tighter at his zipper and he knew he'd be helpless if terrorists descended upon their school at that moment. But she didn't stop, and instead just dragged the red flesh back and forth across her lower lip.

Finally, Sousuke stole the cherry from her fingers and popped into his own mouth. Kaname gave a brief, oblivious pout, but didn't complain that he'd stolen the last of her snack. Sighing with relief, Sousuke tried to believe that it was enough to experience the same taste as he would have if he had just given up control for a moment and kissed her like he wanted.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: The good news is that my FMP plot bunnies are hopping again after a few stressful work months that took all of my energy and attention. The bad news is that I'm a little out of writing practice and this fic isn't exactly what I'd hoped it would be. But I'm posting it because it is <em>something<em> and hopefully I'll be in the full swing of things soon.

AN2: LuxKen27 is (potentially) having another summer mini challenge, so there might be more fics on the horizon that are longer than 300 words.

AN3: This fic was originally published in the livejournal community fanfic_bakeoff on May 24, 2012 for the prompt "Cherry."


	14. Communication

**Title:** Communication  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic  
><strong>CharactersPairings****:** Sousuke/Kaname  
><strong>Author: <strong>Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 300  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Summary:<strong> They both realize that they're ready for the next step.  
><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I'm planning on writing another new story for the FMP fandom set after the end of the entire series. I thought, to kick myself in the butt toward actually sharing it, I'd give a little preview. Here it is.

-x-

"I think you're the most amazing person I've ever met," said Sousuke with a tinge of awe and reverence in his voice.

Head still lowered, Kaname chanced a peek upward, hopeful that his words were true. His eyes held their usual direct stare that would make her heart do flips in her chest, but this time there was something more. His eyes were filled with more emotion than she had ever seen, conveying compassion and reassurance.

Kaname straightened, crashing her lips into his. He smiled under her assault, cupped her jaw in his left hand to better angle the kiss into something softer, fuller.

After a few seconds, Sousuke realized that this kiss was very different than the elated small kisses from the day before. It was so much more than mouths and tongues and pressure and sensation. This was communication.

Years of emotions for Kaname that Sousuke had routinely tamped down began to rise to the surface. Desire, hunger, want, astonishment, and a deep, fearless love crashed through all of his defenses and made themselves known in their kiss.

Sousuke knew this because Kaname was reflecting those same emotions as her tongue twined with his and her breathing grew ragged.

There were no obstacles. There was nothing to prevent what both wanted, what both new was next. Even the fingers of Sousuke's right hand that were gently following the curve of Kaname's bare spine didn't tremble or hesitate as they would have previously. Neither was embarrassed that Kaname only wore a towel, and in fact, both felt it was still too much.

They were ready. It was time.

Or it would have been had Kaname's phone not chosen that moment to interrupt.

Both smiled into one another's mouth with mirth and frustration. Lunch with friends had almost been forgotten.

END.

* * *

><p>AN2: This was originally written for the livejournal community fandom_bakeoff on June 28, 2012 for the "rise" prompt and also includes the secret ingredient "time."<p>

AN3: As stated above, I'll be writing more story around this little preview. Also, as it is the time of LuxKen27's summer mini-challenge (which started all of my FMP drabbling to begin with), I'll be posting here on the drabbles a little more frequently. Hooray for FMP writing!


	15. Free Advice

**Title:** Free Advice  
><strong>CharactersPairings****:** Celina (OC), Sousuke/Kaname  
><strong>Author: <strong>Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 1638  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Summary:<strong> The night of Kaname's arrival in Texas, Celina gives Sousuke some free advice.  
><strong>Author's Note:<strong> Sequel to "There it Is." Warning: More Celina.

-x-

"Just don't talk to me! Leave me alone!"

The slamming door reverberated through the whole of the small Texas house.

Sousuke thought better of knocking on the door and asking Kaname to let him explain himself better. She was too mad and needed time to calm down. Kaname had just had a long and trying day merely getting to Celina's house, so Sousuke wasn't very surprised that Kaname was short tempered with him, though he had no real idea what he had said to set her off this time. He had only been trying to discretely find out if her clothes had been bugged when he had run his hand over her back. And up until the time he had questioned her about such devices, she hadn't seemed to have minded. She was a mystery to him a lot of the time.

He turned in the narrow hallway of the Jekka's house and nearly collided with the surprised couple.

They were arm in arm, on their way to bed and both held a bemused, curious look for the frustrated young sergeant.

Sousuke froze in his tracks, unsure of where to retreat. The path to the living room where a bed was set up for him on one of the couches was blocked.

Celina pulled away slightly from her husband, smiled widely at him, and patted him on the shoulder. There was some silent communication between them carried on with glances and smiles that ended with Celina's husband winking at her and saying, "'Kay, then. See you in a bit."

He then attacked Celina's neck with loud, sloppy kisses that had her squealing and giggling with delight before she pushed him a way, toward their bedroom.

Celina turned to Sousuke with twinkling, delighted eyes, and crooked her finger at him. "You're coming with me."

"Yes, ma'am," he replied, following her toward the kitchen.

"I've told you before, you better shitcan that 'ma'am' business, Soldier. It makes me feel fat and old." Celina turned the corner and headed toward the refrigerator, opening the freezer, pointing to the kitchen table for him to sit.

"You're definitely not old, ma'am."

Celina looked back over her shoulder, annoyed. She then shook her head, chuckled. "I think I need a snack. We have freeze pops which are nice for such a hot night. Want one?"

"Uhhh," responded Sousuke. He had been satisfied by the large dinner cooked by Kurz that had been followed by brownies for dessert. Celina took his hesitation as assent and retrieved two snacks, raspberry blue for herself, cherry red for Sousuke.

As she handed him his cold treat, she said, "I can see why she gets upset with you."

Sousuke let out a long sigh. "Well, I can never seem to figure it out, myself."

Celina took her time settling in to the seat near Sousuke at the table. Through the dim yellow light that Celina had turned on above the sink, they regarded one another as they nibbled on the icy desserts.

"Do conversations between the two of you often end with shouting and slamming doors, then?" ventured Celina.

Sousuke grunted, his steely eyes focusing on the wood grain of the table. "And her using her harisen, shoes, and wrestling moves on me. Protecting her has by far been my hardest mission ever because most of the time I need protection _from_ her. I just don't get it. She seems to think that everything I do is wrong."

Celina took a deep breath, "God, I remember being a teenaged girl. You couldn't fucking pay me enough to go back in time and do it all over again. It's pretty hard."

Sousuke looked up and saw Celina gazing off, remembering. She then came back to the present and held Sousuke's gaze.

"What you have to realize is that even being a normal high school girl is pretty damn difficult. It's like..." She struggled for a metaphor, then smiled at the young man before her, "...defusing bombs."

Sousuke's eyebrows jumped and his posture straightened a bit more. Defusing bombs was definitely serious and dangerous.

"You know that bombs are all different with different types of detonators, fuses, explosives, and all of that. You can't use the same method for defusing different bombs. Car bombs are different from pipe bombs, are different from vest bomb, et cetera."

"Yes," he answered. "It takes education, experience, and extensive training in order to learn how to not only build a bomb, but to take one apart safely. And one must become used to the variety of ways different bomb makers would build similar bombs."

"Exactly. Well, it's kind of similar to the way that most girls in high school have to learn to deal with different relationships. In high school, most girls just want to be able to get along with everyone else and be well-liked. They have to act one way to be liked by other girls in their school, then act another way to be liked by boys in their school. Then there are teachers, parents, other authority figures: there's a kind of method to defuse situations with every kind of person. Get it?"

Sousuke nodded slowly, but it was obvious he didn't quite get the metaphor.

"Ugh. I had such a terrible time in high school. Take dating: If you didn't have a boyfriend, you could be a pariah because that meant you were ugly or weird or unlovable. Boom! Bomb goes off for your social life. If you had too many dates or boyfriends, people would start gossiping, saying that you were easy. BOOM. A different bomb in your social life. The same thing goes for dating the wrong guy, dating at the wrong time, being too serious, being not fucking serious enough. And that's just dating!"

Sousuke finished his freeze pop, not taking his eyes of Celina as she grew more animated.

"You had to know how to deal with teachers so that they liked you and didn't grade you too harshly, but you couldn't look like a suck-up in front of the class or they would hate you! Friendships, too! It just doesn't end. And if you got one little part wrong: BOOM!" Celina mimed a bomb going off by throwing her arms up and out. "There goes your fucking social life, which can feel like it's the only part of your life worth living when you're a teenager!"

"Kaname does very well with her social relationships with both friends and teachers." Sousuke considered his history with her. "Well, mostly. There was in incident when she refused to date someone and he wrote disparaging things about her on the walls of the bathroom."

Celina took a breath, appalled. "That sucks!" Sousuke could do nothing but nod in agreement with that assessment.

"So, you see? It can't be easy for Kaname. Plus, she's dealing with all of this travel and... intrigue... on top of being a normal teenager. And then there's you..."

Sousuke nodded slowly, finally understanding.

"You look like one particular type of bomb, but you are so obviously not what you seem. You don't react the way she's expecting and it's got to be extremely goddamn frustrating for her. So you want some free advice?"

"Uhhh..." As well meaning as Celina seemed, even with all of her willingness to share some insight into civilian teenaged girls' minds, he wasn't convinced that any advice she had to give would actually work for him in his role as Kaname's guardian.

Celina pinned him with her gaze, scrutinizing him. "You haven't had a normal life, have you?"

Sousuke frowned and didn't answer. He didn't talk about his past much with those he'd known and trusted for years, let alone a relative stranger. Also, he could never predict what someone's reaction would be when he disclosed he'd been basically raised to be a mercenary from the time he was a very young child.

"From what I can tell, you've had it incredibly rough. And... I'm so sorry for you. I don't know what you've been through. I don't think I could bear hearing about it right now." Celina rubbed her pregnant belly, musing, "I need to believe the world isn't as violent and scary as it is."

Celina's mouth twitched as she tried to smile through a frown, her eyes misting over. "But it seems like whatever you've been through, you've come out pretty awesome in the end. And what you've been through is helping you make Kaname safer, right?"

Celina sniffed, then managed a genuine smile for Sousuke. "So my advice is: Don't change a fucking thing. Kaname's a smart girl. She'll figure out how to defuse you sooner or later. Try to be patient when she gets frustrated, okay? It's not easy for her, either."

Sousuke straightened and suppressed a salute, "Affirmative, ma—Celina."

Celina slowly got up and made another trip to the freezer. She pulled out a lemon yellow freeze pop and handed it to Sousuke. "For Kaname. And don't say, 'To cool you off,' because she'll kill you if you do. Just a warning."

Sousuke nodded again.

Celina rustled Sousuke's hair in a way that was both sisterly and maternal before turning in to bed. Sousuke mused on her lecture as he slowly made his way back to the room Kaname was sharing with Melissa. It was no shock that life was difficult for Kaname, especially when he was around and completely at a loss in most social situations. But he did feel some peace of mind that Celina had confirmed that he was doing the right thing and that Kaname might some day come around to understanding why he behaved the way he did.

Maybe a lemon freeze pop would be the start of smoothing things over. At least until the next time.

END.

* * *

><p>AN2: Ugh. This story was so much better and more relevant in my head. I'm happy to hear what others thought of this. I will be posting notes for this story under my livejournal and dreamwidth accounts (screenname starzki).<p>

AN3: This is my first story for LuxKen27's Summer Mini Challenge 2012. The prompt was "lemon yellow."


	16. Chafe

**Title: **Chafe  
><strong>Author: <strong>Starzki**  
>Rating: <strong>K+**  
>Genre: <strong>Action/Humor**  
>Prompt: <strong>heat  
><strong>Word Count: <strong>606**  
>Summary<strong>: Melissa Mao hates the heat.

-x-

It seemed as though wars always seem to concentrate in countries with the most god-awful weather. If they weren't fighting in some snowy tundra at a thousand miles elevation, then they were in the sweltering jungles where mosquitoes were known to be big and organized enough to throw gang signs before they bit you.

Mao and Weber were racing through the latter type of country in desperate search of their rendezvous point. The humidity was so thick it threatened to drown them and the sun was unrelenting, even under the tall trees whose branches dripped with thick vines.

Melissa considered and decided she much preferred the cold.

"Echo Point should just be over that rise, there," said Kurz, refolding the map even as he ran. "We can wait here, or over by that stream, until we hear the copters come for us."

"Fine," spat Melissa, impatient that they couldn't just get out of there. The mission had been completely FUBAR'ed. An electromagnetic pulse used by the enemy had rendered their Arm Slaves inoperable, but they had been able to defeat their foes on foot and camouflage their units before they took off at a near-sprint 10 kilometers through the god forsaken jungle in unspeakable heat and humidity.

Kurz splashed water from the stream on his face, careful to avoid actually drinking any.

Melissa filled her canteen and then emptied it over her head. She had been sweating so badly that even being doused with water didn't change her appearance.

She was about to refill the canteen again when Kurz heard her hiss in pain.

"Mao, you injured?"

"Negative." She was scowling, but Kurz couldn't see that she was favoring any particular joint or limb.

She upended the canteen above herself again, letting the water fall toward her back this time. And again, she squeaked in surprise with sudden pain.

"Seriously, Sis, what's the problem?"

"The fucking problem is that I'm bouncing through the goddamned jungle with a soaked-through sports bra and an enormous set of knockers."

"Wh- Wha?"

"You heard me! Fucking _boobs_! I run, I bounce, I sweat, then I fucking chafe. Reason eight hundred and thirty one that it can suck to be a woman."

"Wait, you're upset over a little chafing? Is that what you're saying?"

"A little chafing?" Mao raised the hem of her shirt and gathered it under her breasts. She winced and pulled higher, revealing a line across her sternum and ribs that was completely abraded, raw, and weeping. She turned and he could see further marks across the muscles in her back.

Kurz sucked in air through his teeth at the angry, painful-looking flesh.

Melissa pulled her shirt down with another scowl. "It's really fine. It just stings a surprising amount when water hits it. Or air."

"But still, will you need that looked at?"

"No, it's just the surface. And since I'm not doing any swimsuit competitions today, it'll be fine."

Just then, the pair heard the beating of helicopter rotors approaching. They raced to the edge of the jungle and crouched. They didn't hear any incoming fire from the enemy, but still knew they had little time to waste in boarding when the chopper landed. They'd come back with reinforcements to secure their AS's as soon as possible.

Just before they broke cover, Kurz leaned over to Melissa and said, "If I had a vote, you'd still win any swimsuit contest you had today."

He was lucky there was absolutely no time for her punch him in the face before they ran like hell for their rescue. She decided to wait until they were in the chopper.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This is my next story for LuxKen27's Summer Mini Challenge 2012. The prompt was "heat." Any feedback is very much appreciated!<p> 


	17. Unexpected

**Title:** Unexpected  
><strong>Author: <strong>Starzki  
><strong>CharactersPairings**: Kaname/Sousuke  
><strong>Words:<strong> 300  
><strong>Rating:<strong> K+  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Maybe Sousuke's fall, though painful, could be seen as a lucky break?  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> None

-x-

It wasn't what I expected to happen that cold, winter evening. The day had been normal enough. There was an explosion, but only minor damage to the school grounds. Nothing that raised even the principal's eyebrows with surprise when she was informed.

On the way home, Sousuke just... slipped. At the time, he was being willfully obtuse about my asking him to tone down his military demeanor enough to go out with me to a festival without embarrassing me. He was all, "But Chidori, blah blah duty. Blah blah mission. Blah blah, I don't care enough about spending time with you to do this one little thing for you."

It was icy at the top of a flight of stone stairs outside of the school and he lost his footing. He made this strange yelp when he hit the bottom of the steps. I was instantly concerned.

Sousuke tends to fall so... athletically. But this time he was sitting at the bottom of the steps, arms braced behind him holding up his leg with the deepest frown I've ever seen him wear.

I'd called a cab before I even got down the stairs.

What followed next was what I expected: emergency room, x-rays, splint, crutches, instructions to come back in two days for a cast. My military maniac had broken his ankle.

What followed was less expected: a flurry of phone calls, endless apologies, and much discussion about medical leave. A fractured fibula, it seems, prevents piloting of Arm Slaves.

Sousuke wasn't going to be available for dangerous Mithril missions for at least three weeks.

I'm probably a bad person, but I was almost glad he'd hurt himself if it meant he couldn't get hurt even worse in some stupid war.

Plus, crutches make him easier to keep track of.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note 1: This drabble was originally written for the livejournal community's open write prompt and posted on July 22, 2012.<p>

AN2: Sorry about the rampant alliteration. I couldn't help myself.


	18. Nickname

**Title:** Nickname  
><strong>Author: <strong>Starzki  
><strong>CharactersPairings**: Celina, Kurz, Melissa  
><strong>Words:<strong> 491  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Kurz tries to figure out from Celina what Melissa's old nickname was.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> More Celina. Also gratuitous swearing.

-x-

"C'mon, Celina, I know there had to have been something."

"No, Kurz, quit asking me. I already fucking told you, Melissa didn't have a nickname during basic training."

"Another denial! That means it must have been something good."

"There was nothing. I promise."

"You know, Celina, like a lot of honest people, you're a terrible liar."

"Fuck you, I'm an awesome liar. It's just that there wasn't a nickname for her. I mean, people tried, but none really stuck."

"What was one that didn't stick, then?"

"Some dummy tried to call her Mouse. As in 'Mao-s,' you know?"

"Mouse? No, you're right. That's awful. I can't imagine a worse nickname."

"Not even Fire Crotch?"

"Heh. Lemme guess... because of your hair?"

*sigh* "Yep. I was the one that gathered all the nicknames and they all had to do with the color red. I've heard them all ever since I started playing in sandboxes with other kids. People are so fucking unoriginal."

"..."

"I see what you're doing! It's not like I'm challenging you to come up with a nickname for me! Celina will work fine! Or Cel."

"No, I was just thinking how clever you were to steer me into another conversation to keep me from asking you what the Sergeant Major's nickname was. Pretty slick, there. It definitely means you're hiding something."

"I hide nothing. Leave me alone and let me shell these peas in peace."

"Fine, let me just give your belly a rub before I go. I've heard somewhere that it's good luck."

"Back the fuck off, Kurz! Just because I'm knocked up doesn't make my stomach community property! Melly's right, you're too handsy!"

"..."

"Shit."

"Melly?"

"Shit."

"_Melly_?"

"No, you're wrong! No one called her that! I said nothing!"

"Oh, ho _ho_! Now this has possibilities!"

"Shut up! Fuck you!"

"Let's see. Right off, I can think... 'Smelly Melly?'"

*gasp* "_No_!"

"This is too great! _Hey, Smelly! Celina just told me your nickname!_"

"What? What happened? I was outside! What did you do, Cel?"

"Nothing! I can't... It slipped out!"

"You promised, Cel!"

"_Sorry_! He used trickery and deceit! ...And then he tried to feel me up!"

"_What_?"

"Whoa, babe! It was just her belly!"

"You tried to feel up _her belly_?"

"..."

"..."

"... No?"

"I hate both of you. Cel... I'm going to drink a nice cold beer right in front of you."

"No! That's evil! You know I can't have any!"

"And Kurz, if you call me 'Smelly' ever again, I'll tear off your arm and shove it up your ass. Do you hear me?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Now, I'm going to go get that beer. Celina, stay right where you are..."

"..."

"..."

"I blame you for this, Celina."

"Stuff it, Blondie, you know this is your fault."

"Oh, who lacks originality, now?"

"Look, let's just pretend this conversation never happened. I'll even help you with the pasta for tonight, 'kay?"

"Deal... Fire Crotch."

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This was terrific fun to write. It will also be the last time in a while that we'll see Celina. I like her too, but I'm wary of leaning too much on original characters. But I did think it fitting to have her interact with every member of the SRT, just for symmatry, and only Kurz was left.<p>

AN2: This prompt was written for LuxKen27's Summer Mini Challenge for the prompt, "scream." Additional author's notes can be found on my livejournal or dreamwidth accounts (user name "starzki"). As always, I adore feedback!


	19. Discovery

**Title:** Discovery  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>CharactersPairings**: Sousuke  
><strong>Words:<strong> 300  
><strong>Rating:<strong> K+  
><strong>Summary:<strong> In order to transition to civilian life, Sousuke explores the world of music.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> None

-x-

Sousuke transitioned slowly into civilian life, but he tried hard. One of the first tasks he undertook was finding music he liked. During his fight for survival, music seemed nice, but distracting. Therefore he paid it little mind.

Yet others found it truly wonderful. They appeared transported when they heard lyrics or melodies that pleased them. Sousuke felt as though he was missing out. He looked to his closest friends so that they could help guide his music tastes.

Tessa liked popular music, both American and Japanese. Colleagues would also find her working hard on some schematic or other while techno music infused the room.

Melissa liked heavy metal and hard rock the best. She liked the beat and the volume. It would push her to work harder, to go further.

Sousuke found that Kurz had eclectic tastes, favoring just about everything. Kurz confided in Sousuke that classical was his true favorite.

Kaname, like Tessa, favored J-pop and American popular music. She liked anything from the Beatles to Michael Jackson, to whatever she could find on the radio. She also had a weakness for '70s rock and roll.

None of these truly suited Sousuke, though. Banging percussion and synthesized sounds of other genres left him confused and unable to really _hear_ the music. He was too unfamiliar to listening to parse the different sounds. He struggled, so Kaname asked Kurz for advice.

With his help, Sousuke stumbled upon his affinity for American bluegrass. The acoustic instruments and haunting melodies were easier for Sousuke to grasp.

While bluegrass wasn't Kaname's favorite, it was a start. Sousuke would branch out in new directions when he was ready.

Therefore Kaname bought Sousuke a set of headphones and would watch him with a gentle smile when he listened, the music transporting him someplace wonderful.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Just a thought exercise in guessing what music the different characters would like. *shrug*<p>

AN2: This story was originally published in the livejournal community fanfic_bakeoff on August 31, 2012 for the prompt "Affinity." Thoughts and reviews are always very much appreciated, so feel free to drop a line and let me know how you felt about the story!


	20. Decision

**Title:** Decision  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 415  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Spoilers for Episode 11 of The Second Raid. Sousuke's moment of indecision with the prostitute.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Adult situations.

-x-

Sousuke is hard beneath her. He can feel the heat of her core pressing into his erection and she's about to kiss him.

Sousuke knows it's time to make a decision.

An hour ago, when Sousuke had met the girl, the prostitute, who had looked so much like Chidori (not the eyes, wrong shape, and her mouth wore a curdled sneer instead of Kaname's sweet smile), coming back to her place hadn't seemed like a bad idea.

After all, he had just deserted all of his comrades and friends. He wasn't being himself. So, why not get some whiskey, a prostitute who looked like Chidori (but who was not Chidori), and do something as Not-Sousuke and Not-Chidori that Sousuke and Chidori would never do?

It had been a bad idea.

Instead of focusing on being Not-Sousuke and just trying to enjoy the company of Not-Chidori, her similarities to his high school friend (was that what they were?) only served to remind him of Chidori, of himself, and of everything that wrong with the situation.

When Not-Chidori laughed at him, he couldn't help but notice her sour, sly looks when Chidori, even when violent, always had his best interests at heart.

She leans into him, blows in his ear and his body doesn't seem to know she's not Chidori so he lets her straddle him, thinking he'll be able to forget.

It's her smell that does it. Her smell is all wrong. Whisky and cigarettes.

All he can do is remember. All he can think is how wrong everything is. The prostitute wasn't a great idea, and leaving Mao wasn't his finest moment, but it's far, far worse than that. He doesn't give a damn about Mithril because they forced him to do the one thing he'll never forgive himself for.

He abandoned Chidori. He left without a single word of goodbye. Honor to his command came before his personal honor, his word that he'd never leave her alone.

Not-Chidori is going to kiss him and all he can do is think of Chidori. She would be so mad at him if she knew he was here. She'd yell, scream, and probably hit him. This thought stirs something warm in him and Sousuke realizes it's the first feeling of happiness he's had since he left Kaname's doorstep with his new haircut.

He's hard and pressed into her. She's going to kiss him. It's now or never.

Though many more await him, Sousuke makes his first decision.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Overwhelmed is not dead. I was just struck with inspiration for this drabble with the help of the livejournal community fanfic_bakeoff. The prompt was "Trick." This was originally posted there on October 21, 2012. Feedback, as always, is greatly loved and appreciated.<p> 


	21. Burned

**Title:** Burned  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 207  
><strong>Rating:<strong> K  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Drabble sequel to "What a Lovely Way to Burn." Prompt fill for "Sick/Flu."  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> None  
><strong>Note:<strong> Written for Crystal Okamino who was not feeling well and asked for some entertainment.

-x-

Sousuke awoke when he felt someone shaking his shoulder. The blurry image of Sergeant Major Melissa Mao slowly swam into focus. One of her eyebrows was arched in judgment as she looked at him.

Moments later, Sousuke realized why: He was lying supine on the couch in Kaname's living room. Furthermore, Kaname was sprawled over him, sleeping, using his chest as her pillow.

Part of Sousuke knew he should scramble out from under her with embarrassment to preserve both of their dignities, but it was impossible. He was too sick, too weak, and just too comfortable to move.

Sousuke grunted, the congestion and and fog of sickness stealing all words.

"We were worried when you wouldn't pick up on the radio," explained Mao.

Sousuke craned his neck, looking past her at the empty glass on the table, hoping she could intuit his thirstiness.

"I'm not here to play nursemaid!" Mao groused, but she grabbed the glass on the way to the kitchen. "And just be glad _I_ was the one in the area because nothing would have stopped Kurz from informing the Captain that you were sleeping with the mission objective!"

Sousuke's ribcage vibrated with what he assumed was a growl from an equally sick, weak, and comfortable Kaname.

END.


	22. Voyeur

**Title:** Voyeur  
><strong>Fandom:<strong> Full Metal Panic!  
><strong>Author:<strong> Starzki  
><strong>Words:<strong> 219  
><strong>Rating:<strong> T  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Kyouko stumbles onto a private moment between Kaname and Sousuke.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> None

-x-

Kyouko turned an out-of-the way corner of Jindai High School and froze. Her lunchtime errand immediately forgotten, she quickly jumped back behind the wall.

She had just caught Sousuke and Kaname _kissing_. It wasn't the fact that they liked each other that was so shocking to Kyouko, it was their intensity that made her blush down to her toes. And the fact that Sousuke hadn't even noticed her demonstrated just how focused on Kaname he was.

The image of the couple was seared into Kyouko's memory. Sousuke had Kaname pinned against one wall, one hand cupping her jaw, the other palming the thigh hitched over his hip. Kaname had her legs wrapped around Sousuke, her ankles locked behind his knees and skirt hiked dangerously high, one hand gripping his hair at its roots.

The kissing was deep and intense. They were arched together, lips tasting, mouths devouring one another. Kyouko had thought that kind of passion only existed in movies and was startled to find it had such a powerful effect on her. Heat blossomed in her lower belly and she felt an odd jealousy that her best friend had found such a ardent boyfriend. It was... interesting.

So, with an evil grin, she readied her digital camera, spun around the corner once more, and pressed the button.

"Gotcha!"

END


	23. War Paint

Title: War Paint  
>Fandom: Full Metal Panic!<br>Author: Starzki  
>Characters: Melissa, Sousuke, Kurz; implied KurzMelissa  
>Words: 100<br>Rating: K+  
>Summary: Melissa called it "putting on her war paint."<br>Warnings: None

-x-

Melissa called it "putting on war paint."

After slipping on her slinkiest dress, she would let Sousuke watch her apply her makeup. An artist, she could make herself almost unrecognizable.

Black surrounded her eyes, highlighting her exoticism.

Red stained her lips and her sly smile promised both sex and death.

A touch of teal green on her eyelids "kept them guessing."

Melissa was at her most serious when she played bait. Also, with the way Kurz clutched his chest and sank to his knees after she later passed him in the hall, it was when she was at her deadliest.

END

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Written in response to LuxKen27's Summer Mini Challenge prompt "teal green."<p> 


	24. The Things He Carried

The Things He Carried

By Starzki

Author's Note: This little fic takes place in "The Sickness" universe. To be specific, this could be a snippet taken from Chapter 7 of that story.

-z-

Jin was well-practiced at the art of opening and closing the front gate for the runners. He could time it so that it raised just enough for the runner to duck under as it closed behind him or her. Even if an infected stood right outside of the gate, Jin knew his technique would prevent them from entering.

The lookout tower guard gave Jin the signal for an incoming runner, and Jin gripped the rope of the pulley system and tugged and released in just the right rhythm. The gate was open for only a brief second as Runner Seven, Sousuke Sagara, slid through.

As was standard protocol, another Jin looked him over for obvious injuries or bites that could turn him. Sousuke used the moment to wipe the sweat from his face with the hem of his shirt. The day was hot and muggy and he wasn't the only runner to come in and form a puddle where he stood. He was uninjured. Then came the inspection of his pack and creating the inventory.

To prevent individual runners from hoarding supplies, all goods were seized at the gate by a Round Table representative to distribute to the rest of the settlement.

Sousuke opened the pack.

Jin wrote down what he pulled out, noting that like the other runners, Sousuke had a specific method to the way he packed. On top were the lightest things. Jin wrote, _For bathroom/toilets, attn. Rei: toilet paper (6 rolls) and three small packs of tissue._ The settlement never seemed to keep up with what was needed for everyone despite heavy rationing. Sousuke said that he had found a nearby hotel had an amazing stock that he visited every time he ran. Jin hoped that bringing it in piecemeal would make it last longer.

Next, Sousuke unpacked the things that he didn't want to bruise. Jin wrote, _For food pantry/mess hall, attn. Kaname: six tomatoes, ripe, four large onions, five small radishes, and one cucumber._

It seemed that Sousuke had a back yard or neighborhood garden on his route.

Next, was what he considered the "cushioning" and anything that needed protecting. Typically, most runners used the middle of his pack for clothing. Jin wrote, _For dorm/closet, attn. Yukio: Four women's shirts (maternity), three pairs of size medium slacks (maternity), six pack of white athletic socks, one large sweatshirt._

Jin realized why Sousuke had focused on maternity wear. It had just been announced to the settlement that Sousuke's partner, Kaname, was pregnant and, in fact, quite a bit along in that pregnancy. She was growing bigger by the day. Bigger clothes would work, but they didn't fit her right, so she'd obviously made a special request of him. Jin suspected that Sousuke had made a special trip out to a maternity shot for her on his run today.

The clothes were wrapped around electronics. Jin wrote_, For comms, attn. Shinji: four coiled phone cords approx. 10 meters long, 2 hand-held cameras, and one dozen AA batteries_

Jin wasn't sure what Shinji could do with it, but there was talk from others in the settlement that Shinji could Frankenstein just about anything he needed from the most random available parts.

Finally, at the bottom of the pack, Sousuke lugged out the heavy things. Jin added, _one car battery_, for the inventory slotted for the comms area. He was also impressed at Sousuke's stamina. That could not have been easy to run with on his back. Lastly, Jin wrote, _For garage, attn. Kamina: three clawed hammers and one adjustable wrench._ Tools were another thing that always seemed in short supply, especially since they were so heavy. A lot a runners did try to avoid carrying them.

"Good work, Seven," Jin said, looking up from the clipboard.

Sousuke wiped the sweat from his temple using his shoulder, then wiped his mouth with his sleeve. "Yes sir," he said.

"Hit the showers when you need to." Sousuke, ever quiet, just nodded and walked away. "Oh, Seven," Jin said before Sousuke could get too far.

"Hmm?"

"You make sure that cook of yours uses those fresh tomatoes for sauce for that creamy curry of hers. Runner Six brought in a goose and I think it might go nicely." Jin grinned at him.

Sousuke smiled back. "Sir, I value my life. Therefore, I wouldn't dare tell Kaname what to do in the kitchen. But you could go ahead and tell her…"

Jin laughed. "No way, Seven. I know better than to be on the wrong side of that woman's temper, especially with the hormones coming from that bun in her oven." He mimed a shudder. "You're a brave man, Seven."

"I'm sure that she'll come up with something wonderful, no matter what." Sousuke half turned before he added, "And she's the brave one. I just try to keep up."

Jin smiled as he thought about the lovely young cook. Having a baby during the apocalypse wasn't ideal, but he and most of the other Jindai settlers he knew were excited at the prospect of a baby. If everything went well with the pregnancy and delivery, having a baby around could give people a lot of hope.

Jin was interrupted from his musings when the tower guard signaled another incoming runner. Jin had a job to do.

END.

* * *

><p>AN2: I have a ton of head canon that didn't fit in "The Sickness" storyline, so I may use this short story collection to post snippets that won't leave me alone. I'd love to hear what you think! Thanks for reading.<p> 


	25. Vault

Vault

By Starzki

-x-

If people could look into Sousuke's head, they might remark that it looked almost exactly the same as a bank's safe deposit box vault. His entire mind resembled rows and rows of carefully labeled, but tightly locked boxes.

The boxes didn't even contain memories. Well, actually, they did in a way, but it was much more than that. Each memory could have up to a dozen boxes. One box would contain the images of what occurred. This box would stand out prominently where Sousuke could access it quite easily should he need the information for a similar situation or to relate it to someone else. This was the box he used to learn and adapt, to continue surviving.

But the other boxes that went along with that memory were further back so that Sousuke wouldn't be tempted to peek into them. These boxes were labeled with things like "Horror," "Fear," "Helplessness," and "Sorrow." He may remember when a fellow soldier stepped on a mine and was blown into a million bloody pieces, but the emotions that accompanied the loss of a comrade – his mind made those inaccessible to him.

The boxes that were always, or almost always open were "Survival," "AS Specs," and "Current Mission." Sousuke also accessed "Loyalty," "Obedience," and "Trust in the Chain of Command" in healthy doses. He also found that "Anger" and "Fear" were helpful if he was careful.

There were other boxes, though, that he avoided so much that he pretty much forgot that they were there. Whenever he learned the information or felt the feelings, he filed them away so quickly, it was almost as though they had never existed. These boxes included "Sex," "Attraction," "Lust," "Magnetism," and "Romance." He knew _of_ them, but they had never been of any use to him. And Sousuke lived and breathed utility in all things. It was a major part of his "Survival" box.

But then he met Kaname. She was so unlike anyone he'd encountered before. She required things of him that he didn't understand. She wanted him to peek into boxes he'd so carefully stored away that he'd forgotten if a key for those boxes even existed.

Sousuke suspected that what fascinated him about her was the way she seemed to have access to all of those keys. She ripped through his mind like a whirlwind, opening boxes seemingly at random. "Attraction" mixed with "Fear" and "Frustration." "Loyalty" and "Friendship" and "Lust" combined in strange ways. It was both exhilarating and frightening for him to lose that control.

Yet every time she rifled through his vault, he became stronger.

Sousuke had a good system. It was a system he _needed_. But after Kaname infiltrated his system, Sousuke began to doubt if it would be something he would continue to need in the future. With her at his side, he could trust himself to open those boxes and fully explore his reality. Maybe he'd remember things he desperately wanted to know, like what his mother looked like.

With Kaname, almost anything felt possible.

END.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: This was written for the LuxKen27's Summer Mini Challenge prompt "doubt." I'd love to hear people's thoughts on it.<p> 


End file.
